Humor by Pastor Anthony J. Massotti Th.M.
Quick links: Curiosity | Mr. Blank
“Dialogue Over A Curiosity”
© 2005, March - Anthony Joseph Massotti

This dialogue was overheard while walking one day near a small wood. It so piqued the interest of this writer that he quickly recorded the conversation as it began. – Ed.
Hey Charles! I think I caught myself a curiosity.
Where did you catch it, Bill?
It was running wild nearby.
Most curious indeed!
What’s it do?
I'm curious about that myself!
Does it have a predator?
I believe it does... I think it's called an apathy.
And that devours a curiosity?
Yup. Unless curiosity devours it first!!
Do curiosities make good house pets?
They run wild at first but once you get comfortable with them they make good company.
Has your curiosity caught anything lately?
It lets some things fly by because it is mostly interested in creatures it's never met.
Must be hard to keep a curiosity's hunger satisfied, right?
Absolutely! A healthy curiosity can catch and consume more things than it can digest in a day.
What do you do with the things it catches it can't eat?
We freeze them on a middle shelf for feeding the curiosity when it seems too weak to hunt.
Will that really revive a curiosity?
That and the love of a master who loves his curiosity.
Do you ever just play with your curiosity?
For sure! They are a lot of fun, especially when you throw new toys at them.
You mean they fetch?
Ya, it's good practice for them to play catch with their masters; keeps master and curiosity as good friends.
Is there only one breed of curiosity?
There was at first, but as mankind became more open to new ideas curiosities seemed to increase too.
What? They evolved alongside mankind?
You might say that as man changed, the curiosities just diversified too. There are many theories as to why.
Do curiosities sleep much?
They are real empathic creatures; they tend to sleep when the master grows tired.
Wow, what a companion; sounds like it follows you everywhere.
If you let it, it will follow you for life.
Has a curiosity ever bitten you?
Ya, but they are usually either love bits or trying to get your attention when your ignoring them.
So are they highly codependent?
Not really, they will run off and find things when you’re not looking. They are just eager to please their master.
Do curiosities ever fight with one another?
Sort of. They tend to sport and try to determine who is the alpha curiosity, but mostly they sport with the master.
How do they do that?
They play hide and sneak-a-peek.
What’s that?
They lurk waiting for you to be not busy, or distracted and then they pounce on you with something new; then run off.
Why do they run away?
Because they want you to chase them and take the new thing from them.
That makes sense. Then your behaving like they do! Your curiosity wants you to be curious about it's new thing.
Exactly!
What happens if you don't chase them?
Oh, they'll sneak up and make light noises in the ear; the sound they make is cuddly 'whaatiiif'.
What happens if you ignore them?
If they are ignored too much sometimes they can get their feelings hurt.
Do they sulk then?
No they just get more determined and wait for an opportunity to run in front of you so you'll trip over them.
Ha ha. So you can never get away from them?
Not really. They seem to simply wait for another more opportune season to get attention.
Sounds absolutely adorable! So curiosities only bond to one person?
Primarily, yes, but whoever is comfortable with their master they tend to want to jump on too.
It would be good for everyone to have curiosity or two.
Ya, its sad to think that there are people whom actually hate curiosities.
Really? Why?
Well, sometimes curiosities get confused with another species?
A different kind of curiosity?
No, actually it is called a prying. A prying looks very similar to a curiosity.
How do you tell them apart?
Pryings are usually a viciously nosey creature; also they smell and yell loudly.
Outwardly similar, but inwardly totally different?
Correct. Curiosities are always gentle but forceful; the prying is a predator.
Well I certainly wouldn't want one of them.
Me neither. People just need to be educated on the difference between the curiosity and the prying.
What is the easiest way to tell them apart so you don't catch the wrong creature?
From a distance watch what they eat! Curiosity loves new things, prying loves old, dead, decaying things.
Yuk! Who would want what they catch on a middle shelf. Or them either.
I love having a curiosity it has helped keep my stress down, my humor up, and my outlook is improved.
Well, thanks bill for showing me your curiosity. I think I’ll go catch me a curiosity or two!!
*** *** *** ***
Editors note: most people don’t know where to look for, or hunt for a curiosity; so, in the best interest of helping others to acquire their own curiosity, the following suggestions are offered
Look for a curiosity in the wildest places of the inner landscape. Curiosities tend to hide at first due to fear of being attacked before they can bond with an owner. Wild curiosities tend to live in ‘bunches’, and their young are called, `spirations. (word origin: : prefix: ‘in’ + spire : suffix ‘ation’).
Study the lives of people who have found curiosities. They will often leave behind clues for other seekers to follow. If there is one thing the curiosity owner loves to do is to help others find their personal curiosities.
Go for a walk with someone who tends to carry their curiosity wherever they go – they can be addicting pets. Curiosities have a native instinct for one another; they will tend to point their noses in the direction of a hiding curiosity. Watch carefully until you see a ‘glimmer’ behind something big.
offer to house sit for someone else’s curiosity while they are too busy to pay attention to them. Once you have spent time with a curiosity your ‘scent’ tends to change and wild curiosities will seek you out thinking you are a curiosity. Once they realize you are not one, it will to late because they will have already bonded with you. As you know curiosities never ‘run away’ once they bond. (some sadly, emotionally damaged souls have driven their curiosity away, however. If you should find such a curiosity you will have to convince it that your love for it is sincere by spending extra time with it at first.)
Take some time to read books that have some of the trademarks of curiosity owners. You will recognize such an owner by the vocabulary they use in their writings. They don’t want to seem ‘uneducated’ so they will replace the curiosity purr (wwwhhhatttiifff) with other words when they write; words like: theory, consider, investigation, hypothetically, “it seems to me:, have you ever wondered, I discovered, and other like words. People tend to want to get credit for their ideas instead of giving their ‘pets’ the credit. Who would believe that is was one’s pet that actually started the search anyway.
Lastly, a suggestion: consider going to a curiosity block party; social gathering; a curiosity completion; a symposium on curiosities. There is nothing more delightful than a room full of curiosity masters letting their curiosities run around playing with other curiosities: or in listening to a speaker demonstrate what his personal curiosity has recently found. Curiosities love curiosities, and owners of curiosities tend to become friends for life.
After everything I have learned since that coincidental day that I discovered that first curiosity owner, I can proudly say: I love all of my curiosities. – J.B.
Historical note from the publisher (1): no curiosity has ever, in all the history of mankind, ever killed a cat. That was a slanderous rumor started in the days of early Egypt when religious zealots wanted to deify the fat cats, and stop the people from wanting to have a curiosity. They used it as grounds to have all the curiosities rounded up and removed from the land. (Many governments and religions have has similar holocausts, and sieges throughout history, but they have never been able to stop people from protecting their curiosities. )
Since that time, those who hate curiosities (or love pryings) have continued to perpetrate this ‘boogy-beast’ idea to scare children into not saying ‘why’ too much (a call which often will draw a curiosity out of hiding). The same scare is used for making sure that only the ideas an elite few will survive the evolutionary process of ideas. This same lie has been used to discourage anyone from experiencing the love of a healthy curiosity. (The nice thing about curiosities is that they are always healthy!) Link: www.catgotyourtongue_comeon.org
Footnotes:
(1) Historical information is summarized from the following published articles and booklets which can be supplied by an curiosity owner:
Swipht, Jonathan. “A Little Curiosity Never Hurts”. Publ. Circa 1700
Wells, Howard J. “A Trip In Time To Ancient Egypt”. Publ. Circa 1900
Azzimov, Jacob. “The Supposed Evolution Of Curiosities.” Publ. Circa 1980
Miller, Danise. “Political Infatuation Regarding Curiosities Undiscovered In The Real World Recorded In The Buried Scrolls Of The Ancient Rants”. Publ. Circa 2000
Other suggested reading;
Stewart, Mary. “The Proper Care And Feeding Of Curiosities” [Health]
Masohi, Karrie. “Why I Love My Curiosity” [Inspirational]
Hawkings, S.E. “The Importance Of Curiosities In Time And Space” [Science]
Chapra, Dee Jack. “The Symbolic Importance Of Finding Your Own Curiosity” [Psy]
Robbins, Andrew. “Curiosity Power! The Key To A Creative Future” [Self Help]
Related topics: pryings. Psychology: curiosity haters. Egyptian cats. Animal sounds.
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Mr. Blank
Hello, my name is:
Mr. Blank.
I believe anything you tell me because
most of the time I am Blank
and everything to me is a Mystery.
My twin brother’s name is Phil.
When Phil’s mind wanders
they usually get his attention by saying his full name:
“Phil In-Duh Blank!”!
a couple of times.
I tried it just now, but . . .
we both are obviously still just plain Blank!
Maybe tomorrow our triplet will show up for a visit.
His name is:
No Longer Blank.
I’ll let you know what he says,
if he decides to speak his mind!
However, he tends to keep his thoughts to himself though…
because by the time he would get an answer to people…
they would have already consulted our Cousin:
Mr. Know-It-All
(Cousin had to drop his last name altogether because
people kept yelling at him saying,
“Know-It-All, Blankety-Blank”)
Know-It got tired of all the people thinking he was arrogant!
I’d ask him for help,
But I can’t remember what the original question was.
Oh well,
At least I’m humble
‘cuz I don’t know blank.
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